‘Don’t Sugarcoat Things’ When Someone You Know is Diagnosed with Metastatic Breast Cancer – Curetoday.com

Breast cancer can be scary and life-altering at any stage, but those with metastatic disease, which has spread to areas beyond the breast and nearby lymph nodes, live a unique experience. Their perspective and decisions are shaped by the knowledge that their illness is incurable and that theyll need treatment for the rest of their lives.

Patients facing this diagnosis often say that only others in the same situation can truly understand what theyre going through. CURE talked with five people living with the disease, all ambassadors for Facing MBC Together, an Athenex Oncology program that includes a website and app designed to provide practical and emotional support. Here, we share an excerpt from Kathleen Friels journey with metastatic breast cancer.

Friel is no stranger to having a misunderstood health condition. Being teased in school as a child with cerebral palsy prepared her well for having metastatic breast cancer, she says. People dont understand, and the same is true of metastatic breast cancer, says the 46-year-old scientist and lab director at the Burke Neurological Institute of Weill Cornell Medicine, who learned in May 2018 that she had the disease and it had reached her spine.

Most kinds of breast cancer are potentially curable, but metastatic breast cancer is not, the Hartsdale, New York, resident says. People assume, Oh, you must be fine because you look fine. It puts a lot of expectations on us that, if somehow were strong enough, then well beat this disease. But with cancer, you can try everything and it might not work.

I really love my job and the people I work with, so in some ways it was almost like emotional therapy to stay involved. Were creating new therapies for children with cerebral palsy, so I feel like its not just a job its really a passion. The people in my lab have been so good to me. One time I had radiation and my doctor told me I shouldnt drive, so I asked a co-worker for a ride. All four of them went, waited for me and took me out to eat afterward.

I have a strong support system with other metastatic breast cancer patients who understand what Im going through. Thank God for social media and support groups. Now that I know those people, I dont feel isolated, even if some others I know arent supportive. Facing MBC Together is also cool because I got to meet all the other ambassadors, and were really close friends now.

If somebody in your life gets a diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer, really listen to them and dont try to sugarcoat things. People think its helpful, but it isnt. At least for me, the most helpful thing is to talk about whats really going on. Even if you say, I dont know what to say, but Ill listen, thats enough.

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'Don't Sugarcoat Things' When Someone You Know is Diagnosed with Metastatic Breast Cancer - Curetoday.com