A voice from the grave wants everyone to know: Be not afraid! Terry Plutos Faith & You – cleveland.com

CLEVELAND, Ohio I see in people what God wants me to see.

Those words coming from most other people would sound pretentious and strange. But they were spoken by Rob Sharkey, whose head was turned away from me. He was staring at me from the corner of his right eye.

Its the only way I can see you, said Sharkey, whose left eye was completely and permanently shut.

Sharkey and I were talking about his vision of life as he was staring death in the eye due to cancer.

I dont want this to be a story where people feel sorry for me, he said. I dont feel sorry for me. I get frustrated sometimes, but I hate pity parties. I dont want one.

Sharkey was born three months premature, weighing only 2 pounds, 9 ounces. He suffered from cerebral palsy. He was permanently disabled from birth. He was unable to move his hands, legs or much of anything else.

Activities most of us take for granted were a chore for Sharkey and his helpers.

And patience.

His life was an endless practice in patience. He had to wait for someone to help him do everything from eating to dressing to bathing...

You get the idea.

But I really dont know anything else, he said. Its been like this my entire life. How can I miss what Ive never had?

He also was classified as being blind.

But I can see you from the corner of my right eye, he said. I also can see you based on what you say and what we talk about.

Sharkey was saying God gave him the ability to see into another persons heart.

THE ODDS AGAINST HIM

Id known Sharkey for the 4 1/2 years that my mama, Melva Hardison, has been at The Village of St. Edward nursing unit in Fairlawn. I first met Rob when he was sitting in a huge wheelchair near the front desk, talking with the receptionist Mary Alice Randle and others who came through the door.

It wasnt Sharkey who told me about his bachelors degree from Kent State in psychology and then a masters degree in counseling. He followed that up with a masters degree in pastoral ministry from Ursuline College. It was some of his friends at the nursing home who told me.

Rob talked about his ability to comprehend and remember lectures from his teachers. He then spoke into a computer that turned his words into academic papers leading to advanced degrees.

Bob Price is Sharkeys uncle. He told the story of how Rob lived on campus at Kent State, attending classes in person. He had caretakers coming into his dorm room.

He had an extremely high IQ but sounded like your best buddy. He came across as an average guy who is friends with everyone. In her eulogy of Rob, his aunt, Cynthia, called him, A human therapy dog. He just made you feel better after every visit.

Thats how Sharkey wanted it.

The odds were against me even surviving when they were feeding me with an eye-dropper in the hospital, he said. I wasnt ever supposed to be able to talk. Lots of people with cerebral palsy cant communicate like I can.

Rob Sharkey (middle) with his mother Alice (left) and aunt Cynthia (right). Photo By Bob Price / Special to Cleveland.com

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

We sometimes hear motivational speakers with a message of making the most of what we have been given. Many of them look like they have a treasure chest of physical and intellectual gifts. We hear them, feel disconnected and think, Nobody knows the troubles Ive seen, as the old gospel song proclaims.

Sharkey knew more about troubles than most of us. He rarely complained. But he did have a message.

I wish people wouldnt confuse a physical disability with a learning disability, he said. Sometimes people talk about me right in front of me like I dont exist. They think I dont understand what is going on.

One of Sharkeys last requests is for everyone not to automatically put limitations on people with disabilities.

See what they can do, he said. Not what they cant do. When I was young, they wondered if I would be able to learn and talk. Would I have friends? I can do all those things.

His love of learning came from his parents, especially his mother Alice Sharkey. She was teacher in the Akron public system, once honored as the districts Teacher of the Year. Along with her husband Bob Sharkey, the family led scouting groups for other disabled kids. They pushed for Rob to be mainstreamed in the school system before that was common.

She died in 2011 from lymphoma. That led to Sharkey leaving his West Akron home and moving into The Village of St. Edward.

DREAM-LIKE GOD MOMENTS

When he was 16, Sharkey went on a Catholic retreat to a Sunrise Service.

You know the song, Be Not Afraid? he asked. I heard it that day. The lyrics went deep into my soul. It has stuck with me ever since.

Then Sharkey spoke the chorus from the song written by Father Bob Dufford:

Be not afraid

I go before you always

Come follow me

And I will give you rest.

Sharkey said those lyrics run through his mind whenever he feels fear tightening its grip on him.

Then Sharkey talked about a dream he had in 1996.

I saw an angel, he said. He said, I mean for you to be my messenger. Spread the gospel. You can use your voice and the computer to do it. "

Sharkey said that was the only time he had a spiritual experience like that. It led to him teaching Bible studies, counseling people, and reflecting the love of God and Christ to others every day.

CONFESSION TIME

Sharkey spoke these words about five weeks ago. He was 58. After all his different health problems, he had been diagnosed with cancer.

Wed had casual conversations for years. We prayed together a few times.

When he was hit with congestion in the chest, it turned out he had cancer of the esophagus and lungs. It was too advanced for any major treatment.

We decided to talk for a story, one that I wanted to write before he died. After an hour-long discussion, he wanted to meet again before I did the story.

We never got together again.

My excuse is when I was visiting my mama several mornings each week, there were always people in Robs room. He seemed to have hundreds of friends. Rather than butt in, I figured wed have more time later. Basically, I wanted to do it on my schedule.

On June 10, I was at the Guardians game. I got a text from my wife reading, Rob died.

I felt as if someone had slugged me in the stomach.

But I also thought of the words Rob heard from his angel: I mean for you to be my messenger. Spread the gospel. You can use your voice and the computer to do it.

With this story, Rob is doing just that.

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A voice from the grave wants everyone to know: Be not afraid! Terry Plutos Faith & You - cleveland.com